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This made me laugh the other day: Zach wanted to borrow one of my ties to dress up in. I asked him what he was dressing up as and he said “Jack is dressing up as the American President and I’m his guard…his left hand man” – Priceless!

Just a quick one from Zach that made me chuckle the other day. I asked him where leather came from?

Firstly he replied “Italy or Rome, I think”.

I then said, “No it’s from an animal, not a country”, to which he replied “Oh, I know it’s a chicken!”.

The innocence of youth eh?

OK, Another one from Zach…

Setting the scene: Zach has a small plastic cap in his mouth and I tell him to take it out in case it gets stuck in his throat (as us parents often say!).

Zach: “Dad, (showing me the plastic bottle top), if I get this top stuck in my throat will I have to go to hospital?
Me: “If it get’s stuck in your throat, yes of course”
Zach “Does that mean I would need plastic surgery?”

Classic Zach!

Just a quick one that Phoebe told me a few weeks ago:

Me: “So what’s a chameleon then?”
Phoebe: “That’s easy, it’s someone who tells jokes on stage”

Not bad Pheebs!

I should have done this years ago, in fact I should have done this the day that Zach and Phoebe uttered their first words. At least then I might have captured all the really funny things that they say, which are almost always by accident or innocently either through blind ignorance or perhaps not quite hearing something properly and then putting 1 and 1 together to make 3!

So I have started now, better late than never, here’s some recent examples…

1. “Dad, I think the archaeologist is at the door” (Phoebe) – This was in fact the architect turning up to take some measurements for the second set of drawings for our proposed bedroom extension.

2. “Why has she got onions on her eyes?” (Zach) – This was a comment made when Zach spotted a girl in a magazine who was receiving a facial in a beauty salon. Of course she had cucumbers on her eyes, not onions!

3. “Dad, if you eat your own toenails, will a foot grow inside your belly?” (Zach) – One of the many crazy questions which Zach asks on an almost daily basis!